Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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