Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Randomize