I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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