Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Randomize
