I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Let the clothes fall where they may.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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