if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
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