My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
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Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
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You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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