You're so nebulous sometimes
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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