now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
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