If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
