Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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