He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
