Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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