Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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