I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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