a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
