So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
