dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize