No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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