..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
