She said her name was "party"
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
