guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
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