We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Randomize