I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
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