YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
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