it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
the day after is always just damage control
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
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