If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
