Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
