I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
When are your genitals available?
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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