I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize