So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
