it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Randomize
