i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
