ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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