i just wanna soil my oats bro
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
