You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
