I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
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