Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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