You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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