11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
