How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Four minutes until I can fart!
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Randomize
