honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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