I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
