i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
