For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
