check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
he puts the penis in happiness.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
