My hair reeks of homosexuality.
why do cheetos always look like penises
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize