turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
