Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize