so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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